I'm a statistical consultant. Most think Statistics is a set of arcane, occult mathematical incantations, which, if used properly, will bless their beliefs and prove statistical---God help us---significance. But statistics isn’t this. It is instead the systematic search for truth, or for a true understanding of uncertainty. Nearly all textbook-uses of statistics result in over-certainty, of people being far too sure of themselves. Contact me for more information. I am available to talk about uncertainty, certainty, and over-certainty; metaphysics, logic, epistemology; R, climate change, Bayesian attitudes; or anything else you’re willing to sit still for. I am available to give talks, lectures, classes, speeches, seminars, or, for the price of a drink, to hold forth.